Back in January, I wrote a post about all the mullets here in Spain and I also briefly touched upon some of the fashion in general. This summer, I touched upon footwear with a post on sloppers. Well, after more months of observation, I feel obliged to identify all the fashion offenders and give out tickets to those who clearly don’t abide by the fashion rules as stated by Hoolia!
Offense #1: Capri pants for men. Ya either wear shorts that go down to your knees or ya wear pants, nothing in between. The men who wear pants that go down to mid shin, and even worse, cover the part between the end of the pant and their shoe with a sock, should be sentenced.
Offense #2: Underwear that shows. Come on people, maybe that was “cool” back in the teenage years, but to see thongs above women’s jeans or to see boxers that go to men’s belly buttons, with their pants almost falling down, is just plain wrong.
Offense #3: Fanny packs. I get it, they are a convenient and safe way to carry around your money and valuables, but they are a big fashion no no. They weren’t even cool when they were cool back in the 80’s and they certainly are not now.
Offense #4: Swimming in your underwear. And Speedos. Is it that hard to wear a regular bathing suit? Unless you are Michael Phelps, swimming for the gold, why wear a bathing suit that shows all you have to offer?
Offense #5: Men in tank tops and their subsequent farmer tan lines. It’s hot outside, yes, but for the sake of looking relatively in fashion, will wearing a t shirt or polo make you that much hotter? It’s just a few more inches of cotton fabric. I know some men like to show off their muscles, but give it a rest before you get arrested!
Offense #6: Tattoos. Tattoos in Europe seem to be even more popular than in the United States, which is hard to believe. I often wonder if people are going to still want their Chinese letters, a chain band or a huge graphic tattoo on their bodies when they are older. I guess it doesn’t matter because they are stuck with them and they are stuck with a ticket from the fashion police.
Offense #7: Socks with sandals. This offense could possibly be the biggest of all (and I see it the most). Why not either wear sandals as they are meant to be worn, barefoot, or shoes that belong with socks? I think someone who knows not one thing about fashion could probably pinpoint this offense.
The list goes on and on, but as I feel I’m becoming meaner and meaner as I write, I’ll give it a rest. However, there may be a follow up post on this subject!